We had a letter this week from our son’s school about the new lunchtime and afterschool clubs on offer.
A new system for allowing the children to enrol for clubs had been introduced to ensure that most get their first choice.
Apparently, there were flaws in the old system which needed ironing out. However, the explanation of the replacement process was, frankly, as clear as mud.
There was mention of instructions being given to children on Monday, followed by “don’t worry if your child isn’t in school on Wednesday you can ring up” then the script went back to talking about Monday again.
I hadn’t a clue and neither had the other mums I asked.
In the end we got it sorted but I felt I had to mention this muddled letter to the head teacher. She was very polite but I sensed I got her at a bad moment.
We both left feeling disgruntled. She probably thinks I am an interfering (not to say stupid) parent who can’t understand a simple instruction. I feel guilty for challenging her but at the same time rather concerned that she didn’t realise how confusing the letter was.
There are two lessons to learn from this, which apply to any copywriting:
1. When you are writing a piece which includes dates, make sure they follow a chronological order. If you need to change this, make sure that the copy is still comprehensible to another person.
2. Ask someone who has no prior knowledge of the subject of your writing to read it through. Do they understand it? If so, then you’ve probably got it right. If they don’t, then have another go or use the services of a copywriter.
Getting an outsider to read this school letter first would have solved the problem. It made perfect sense to those in the know about the new system but left everyone else confused.
Incidentally, the clubs on offer for the children are excellent, the new system – now I understand it - is sensible. The teachers deserve buckets of praise for all the effort they put in to making school as interesting and fulfilling as possible and for giving up their time to run the clubs.